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Joke of the Month

Newsletter | March 2nd, 2010

Joke of the Month

Messaging Bloopers

Anytime you have correspondence with the public you need to double or triple check your messages.  Here are some funny examples of Church Bulletins that were never double checked.  These sentences (with all the BLOOPERS) actually appeared in church bulletins or were announced in church services…

  • The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.
  • The sermon this morning: ‘Jesus Walks on the Water.’ The sermon tonight:  ‘Searching for Jesus.’
  • Ladies, don’t forget the rummage sale. It’s a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.
  • Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say ‘Hell’ to someone who doesn’t care much about you.
  • Don’t let worry kill you off – let the Church help.
  • Miss Charlene Mason sang ‘I will not pass this way again,’ giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.
  • For those of you who have children and don’t know it, we have a nursery downstairs.
  • Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help they can get.
  • Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church… So ends a friendship that began in their school days.
  • A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.
  • At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be ‘What Is Hell?’  Come early and listen to our choir practice
  • Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
  • Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled.  Proceeds will be used to cripple children.
  • Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered.
  • The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment and gracious hostility.
  • Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM – prayer and medication to follow.
  • The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. They maybe seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.
  • This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.
  • Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10 AM. All ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B. S. Is done…
  • The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the Congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday.
  • Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM. Please use the back door.
  • The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare’s Hamlet in the Church basement Friday at 7 PM.. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.
  • Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church.  Please use large double door at the side entrance.
  • The Associate Minister unveiled the church’s new campaign slogan last Sunday: ‘I Upped My Pledge – Up Yours ‘ .

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Video Marketing

Newsletter | January 29th, 2010

Tony Mandarich

By Tony Mandarich

Viral marketing (and advertising) is a powerful technique that makes good use of social networks to increase brand awareness. Understanding the important role that video marketing plays in promoting your business online will make a huge difference in the success of your marketing efforts.

The theory of viral marketing is simple; if you have a compelling, true story, a friend will tell a friend, will tell a friend, will tell a friend and so on. Also referred to as word of mouth marketing, the livelihood of this extraordinary form of marketing thrives on people talking to each other about you, your service, and your product. Viral marketing can make or break your reputation on the Internet. With the influx of [good and bad] information on the Internet, whether solicited or not, your story has to capture the attention of your audience and be proven to be true and supportive of ethical Internet practices.

The behavioral characteristic of word of mouth marketing is well known; a satisfied customer will tell an average of three people about a product, service or experience; an unsatisfied customer will tell about a dozen.

Viral marketing and word of mouth marketing are the foundation for social networks; networks of people interacting with other people in social activities, for the innate purpose of sharing information, services and ideas.

Its human nature to talk; to capture this market share, you need to make sure people are talking about you and what they have to say is nothing but positive!

Viral Marketing Using Video

Social networks have made Internet marketing quite competitive, which has forced marketers into video production. Words can relay a message, but a professional, compelling video is worth a thousand words.

ComScore, a leader in measuring the digital world, released data in May of 2008, indicating that U.S. Internet users viewed 11.5 billion online videos from February to March 2008; ComScore further reported a 64% gain from the previous year.

In the same study, Google Sites once again ranked as the top U.S. video property with more than 4.3 billion videos viewed (38 percent share of all videos), gaining 2.6 share points versus the previous month. YouTube.com accounted for 98 percent of all videos viewed at Google Sites. Fox Interactive Media ranked second with 477 million videos (4.2 percent), followed by Yahoo! Sites with 328 million (2.9 percent) and Viacom Digital with 249 million (2.2 percent).

Video marketing has become quite adaptable to today s online marketing techniques; from traditional online video advertisements [commercials], to interactive Flash (SWF or FLA) messages, online learning (e-learning), to brand able software, and even messages to mobile devices, video composition done right can spark quite a bit of word of mouth enthusiasm and can create high social networking potential. With this much technology at our fingertips, why wouldn’t you choose to promote your business with video?

Let s face it; online video marketing is undeniably the best way to get your message out to the millions with just click of your mouse. As bandwidth and Internet access get higher and faster, online video broadcasting will soon become the first and foremost form of communication.

Google s Algorithm Update

Generating more visual excitement about your product or service is great, but spreading your message via video stream on the Internet has other benefits as well. Google is constantly updating their algorithms to make search functionality more consistent with what Internet users are looking for. With the most recent changes in Google s algorithms, it’s now easier for the Googlebots to crawl videos, and online marketers can take full advantage of keyword search technologies for their videos as well.

In July of 2008 Google announced they improved their handling of Flash files in search results; they say they now have a better ability to index textual content in SWF files of all kinds, including buttons, gadgets and so on. Improved techniques also include simple JavaScript as well.

Google teamed up with Adobe to develop an algorithm that explores Flash files, in just the same way that a person would, by clicking buttons, entering input, and so on. Their algorithm remembers all of the text that it encounters along the way, and that content is then available to be indexed.

In addition to finding text, Google says they are also able to find URLs to feed them to their crawling pipeline. Apparently, all with a little help from Flash-maker, Adobe.

About The Author

Tony Mandarich owns & operates Mandarich LLC, a full-service web media business specializing in web site development & optimization, video production, photography & Internet marketing.

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Making Money On the Internet With Video Marketing

Newsletter | January 29th, 2010

Liane Bate

By Liane Bate

It may seem daunting to most people, but like it or not, video is becoming a huge part of the internet. Nowadays, if you’re not making money on the internet, it may be because you’re not using videos as one of your main marketing tools.

Technology is scary to a lot of people, not to mention, exposing oneself online in a video for the whole world to see. That’s why so many people shy away from learning what it takes to market a business using video – either they figure it’s too technical for them, or they want to maintain their privacy.

That’s precisely why you should think about making money from the internet with video. It’s the things that people don’t want to do that you should be jumping on as a new opportunity for you. In the internet business world, it’s where you find holes, and gaps, and things that people don’t want to do that you can start making real money online.

Video is becoming more and more like the written word, and will soon have the same tagging capacity as you find in articles and blogs that are carefully sprinkled with effective keywords.

In that sense, if you are looking to make money on the internet, you can expect the search engines to send heaps of traffic your way if you have keyword packed videos.

Videos are very effective in teaching people how to do things, and can probably establish more trust from someone thinking about buying one of your products or services if they can see and hear you.

Furthermore, just like sharing information via social networking sites from blogs and articles, and other information sites on the net, videos also have their social networking services that allow you to share your videos with others in your niche.

If you think you’re in the dark about technology and will never have a clue how to use it, or how to make money on the internet with video, then have no fear! Any good video creation or syndication service will offer easy-to-follow training for setting up your first, and subsequent videos.

Much like article writing, you’re not done with your videos after you’ve created them. You have to submit them to video syndication sites to spread them around the net.

If you’ve been involved in manually submitting your articles to the various article directories, you will realize how time-consuming and tedious this can be, and how much worse you can expect it to be for submitting a video file!

Luckily, just like article submission services, there are video submission services that can save you loads of time on your video uploads!

If you really don’t want to venture into the land of video marketing, you can always opt for an equally popular podcast, or audio cast, so that the whole world only hears you, but doesn’t have to see you. You can start making money on the internet just as fast with an effective podcast that you submit the same way as videos.

Just think about the results you could achieve by combining article writing with video marketing, and podcasting! Most people are familiar with YouTube, so if you visit their website, you will be able to setup an account, create your video, and start making money on the internet faster than you ever imagined!

Don’t be fooled by the all the technological jargon out there. If you know how to work a digital camera, have a movie feature on your camera, or have ever used a camcorder, then relax! You are most of the way there!

Making money on the internet can happen for you, and tackling your fears about technology and starting a video or podcast marketing campaign can make your dreams come true, especially now when it’s still relatively new!

About The Author– Liane Bate owns a Plug-in Profit Site web business. Afraid to show your face on video? Get over it and start Making Money On the Internet

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